John had 32 candy bars. He ate 28 of them. What does John have now? daibetes, john has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

a blind man walks into a bar it hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did Dumbledore fall off the astronomy tower? Because Snape killed him.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man walks into a bar... ouch. He received a minor concussion from the impact of the cement wall, and a slight goose egg on his forehead.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

The joke above me is a wind-up, losers :P

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

hi.... bonjour... hola... DOOO YOUUUU UNDERSTANDDD MEEE !!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why does crazy george spin a ball on his fingers well? because he has a huge dingo

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a guy who has sex with kids? A child molester

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why was six afraid of seven? Fishsticks

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Emo Girl: Whats Your Favorite song? Regulor Girl: Something Carrie Underwood sing!(: Emo Girl: Are you retarted? Regulor Girl: Well im not the one who loves Emos .-. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Honstley, I didnt right this my cousin told me to wriget this... i think its stupied... And Yes, Ima Emo but im not trying to judge people if there emo or not! :D Luv ya! -Angel- <3

thumb_up thumb_down -158

What's the difference between a gay white man and a gay black man? Nothing because they are both sexually attracted to men.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

Dislike this!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +53

What?

thumb_up thumb_down +49

An Asian, Burnett, and a Blond are stranded on an island. They all say, "What the crap?! How'd I get on this island?!"

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeline McCann.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Their names, if you know them. If not just say "excuse me"

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q: A black man is walking down the street with a television, where did he just come from? A: Best Buy, he just got a bonus, and wanted to reward himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what do you call a grown man driving a plane you dont it isnt possible to drive a plane

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's green and invisible? This cabbage.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why dont we just make fun of both? *mexican music plays*

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Did you hear about the blonde who jumped out off a bridge? She was clinically depressed and took her own life because of her terribly low self-esteem.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How long does it take a black woman to take a shit? Why in the world would you want to know something like that? But anyway, the answer is somewhere, on average, between 10 seconds and 15 minutes. It really varies and conditions like irritable bowel syndrome and constipation affect this range. Actually it takes about 9 months.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops