Why was the woman crying? Because I hit her with a bat.

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Want to hear a joke? Me too.

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What's better then petting a lion? Petting a lion and not getting eaten

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A man was walking down the street He was then killed in a drive by.

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What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile

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What's big and green and would probably kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table.

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A guy walks into a bra. The woman screams and calls 991.

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A student often slept through his alarm, which led to a lower class attendance rate and thus a poor performance on his exam

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Why did the kid have a toy truck? because he bought it

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? I'm not sure, he could not unwrap them.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Man 1: Do you want to hear a joke? Man 2: Sure. Man 1: Okay.

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What's the difference between your mother and a prostitute? Nothing.

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whats worse than one week in school? two weeks in school. whats worse than two weeks in school? three weeks in school whats worse than three weeks in school? child abuse, killing animals and murder

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why is my wife crying? because she doesn't like tomatoes

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whats green and has wheels? a green tractor.

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Why did the black guy not tip his pizza driver? Because he didn't order pizza.

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What did the caterpillar say when he emerged from his chrysalis? I am a butterfly.

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Q: whats the difference between a shoe and a ginger? A: shoes have soles.

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hi

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Beware of orange frogs with black stripes! They are dangerous! On the other hand, if you see a black frog with orange stripes, you're in no danger.

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how you throw 'em.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I need a job Stop spitting on me

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops