A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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What did all of the blind children sing on the bus ride? Nothing because they drove off a cliff

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What did the black guy get on the SATs? Who knows, that isn't a specific person

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What did the Christian say to the Muslim? Our faiths are actually derived from the same Judeo base.

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What do you call one white guy surrounded by 10 BIG black guys? The most common NFL Offence

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Q: Whats blue and white and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A: A tree wearing a denim jacket.

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Timmy: "Dear Santa, why don't you ever come to my house?" Santa: "Because you don't have parents, Timmy" THE END

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women's rights

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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And the girl said: "I'll be ready in 2 hours!"

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Knock, knock! Who's there?! Your Mom! Your Mom who? No really. Let me in.

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What do you call a green land with wheels? Grass lied about the wheels.

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Why did the car slow down? Becuase the driver pressed the break

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Roses are red Violets are blue I gotta go to the bathroom

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How do you know if someone is vegan? They'll tell you.

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Why did the weiner dog have a bad childhood? Uncle Monty put his foot up its arse on a daily basis before chewing dorris's nose, ears and eyelids.

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Why couldn't the hobo buy any clothes? They did not have his size available.

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How did the blond become a pilot? By attending flight school, graduating, applying to an airline to which she subsequently was hired to, taking frequent training courses, and beginning work.

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whats fat and ugly ? aidan slattery

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what's the difference between dodo and doodoo doodoo is still around for you to see

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Roses are red violets are blue I can't rhyme fridge

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Whats worse than losing your phone? Buying a new one and then losing that

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I wont say I got much money, but neither do I need it, just be honest to me, because if you lie, every advice I give you, could cost you or me everything, our lives, our families... Collateral damage is a term used very often and lightly ever since 9/11

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LAST COMMENT? DISGUSTIIIING! NO YOU TAKE IT!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops