What do you call a moose with a 42 gauge shotgun pellet through its head? Open Season

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why was the woman in the kitchen? she was being held hostage there by Bob Saget

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So much with being an author... You with the Feds? The CIA?

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I was so fat I went on a diet

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Yo mama's so fat she needed a toilet that had a bigger seat (just like me)

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A duck walks into a restraunt and sit's down at it's table. The waiter asks what the duck would like to eat. The duck says "I'd like a tasty, healthy meal that will help me lose weight." The waiter says "How about the rocket salad?" So, the duck orders a rocket salad, eat's it, pays his bill, and leaves.

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger Stand a little taller Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone What doesn't kill you is a bad attempt on your life.

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Fucked thinking zero out of sub level -1 I hate Black Mexican Jews Born in China! But that does not make me a racist! I insist I am not a racist, there exists only two of them and they are both assholes... ...Or is that racist? :S NeroMetal: The ONLY Moralman aka the most pointless man in history not the "leader of Neronist whatever fuck I raped and killed that Faqq0t murderer, no fucking "Church Of Nero" There is no code embedded here... ...Or is that racist?:S

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69

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Q - Why did the baby spit out his dummy? A - Because i stabbed him.

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Why was the kid mad? Because he died.

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How much is that doggy in the window? It's not for sale....it's waiting to be euthanized.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I lost The Game, You just did too.

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Q: Why was the black guy afraid of the chainsaw A: It was cutting his arm off

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what did the tomato say when he was cut open? nothing, because vegetables are unable to speak

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24... wait i thought of something better than 24... let me hear it... 25!!!!

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The optimist sees the glass as half full. The pessimist sees the glass as half empty. The average American sees a half-finished glass of water that is not flavored and is therefore is not worth any reasonable person's time.

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A man walks into a bar, I forget the rest of this joke and your mother's a whore.

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Why did the Smartie get fired from the M&M factory? For throwing out all the W&Ws

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A duck walks into a bar "Can I have some brandy, please" says the duck The bartender then proceeds to make millions because he was the first to discover a talking duck

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are rather unintelligent animals which clearly underestimate the dangers of crossing a busy road.

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A man walks into a bar and wakes up in the hospital with a mild concussion.

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Why did the Asian woman get into a car accident? She didn't pay attention in driver school and sped through a red light and hit a bus that killed 14 children.

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The U.S. economy is in poor condition and it's downfall would have repercussions throughout the entire world.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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