A Jew, a Muslim and a Christian walk into a bar. The Muslim is dissatisfied with the choice of the meeting place since the Islam forbids drinking alcoholic beverages.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Wanna hear a joke? Woman's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

GONNA

thumb_up thumb_down -1

So a man walks into a bar, asks for a beer, then drinks it. He then goes home expecting to have dinner with his wife and 2 kids. His wife smells his breath before that and asks him what happens. The men opens to his true and only love and tells her he's having a bad time at work. So they share a hug and talk about it. The man is then renewed, starts pulling up at his job and gets a promotion to general supervisor. He lives happily and watches his kids grow and become professionals. He then dies of a heart attack at the advanced age of 89 while he was watching his favorite TV show.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the black man buy watermellon? Because he was having a barbecue in his suburban neighborhood and he wanted some fruit.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: Why did the wihte man buy a burger? A: cuz he was hungry

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How did the fat guy servive the plane crash??????? He bounced

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah...

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's the difference between a pizza and a jew. One's a tasty delicious snack and the other one's a pizza.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Is your refrigerator running? If so, it sounds like you've got a well manufactured, correctly working appliance. If not, you might want to either have a technician come over and look at it or you should simply replace it with a working one.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did Newton say to Einstein? Nothing, Newton was dead before Einstein's birth.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? .The Police The Police who? ..The Police The Police who? ...The Police The Police who? ....The Police The Police who? .....The Police The Police who? ......The Police The Police who? .......The Police The Police who? ........The Police The Police who? .........The Police The Police who? ..........The Police The Police who? Forget this. *Gunshot*

thumb_up thumb_down -3

almost as accidental as your spelling im afraid

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q:Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, an honest lawyer and an old drunk are walking down the street together when they simultaneously spot a hundred dollar bill. Who gets it? A:The old drunk, of course; the other three are mythological creatures.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Nero, listen, do not try to imply that you created the Iron man method, that was developed by many people over the duration of many years in the former underground society. You seem far too educated to be the savage you claim to be, if I told you that our people will do the uttermost to see if we can fix that eye of yours and succeed, will you forgive my failure and imperfections as a leader? Look at it this way, I am a leader, not a ruler, what my followers do is up to them, but if they cannot understand that they have to pay the consequences behind their actions, they have no place within the order, as for the expression "my order" it is simply what my many followers like for me to say, not because they are unwilling to take responsibility, but as a token of praise. Our articulations and means of expressing desire and such are very much the same, have you ever been part of our order?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

today at school... I learned about all the core subject plus the additional electives.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

FAMOUS DUDE:SWAG! Thank you, thank yo- HEY NO FLASH PHOTOGRAPHY, NO YOU CANT HAVE MY-KABOOM AUDIENCE: . . . YAY CLAP CLAP CLAP.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the mexican wash his car? The car was dirty

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How do you kill a black man? feed him mayonase

thumb_up thumb_down -3

so a jew walks into a bar and leaves at 9:00 becuase he has work in the morning.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What if the rest of you value something wrong?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Is it normal to eat breakfastr in the morning? Yes By Logan in South Dakota

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats the difference between a polish drunkard and a German scholar? They are two different nationalities.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

long in the tooth!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops