Three guys at the beach decided to bet on who could swim the farthest. The first guy, could not swim so he lost. The second guy got a cramp right away. The third one swam far away into the distance, and was not seen or heard on for days... Three weeks later his corpse was found floating by the shore. The other two died out of guilt.

you're mommas so fat that her doctor says she is morbitly obese and may die of a heart failure later in life

What do you call a man with no legs or arms trying to ski? Impossible.

Whats worse than falling off a bike? rape.

A duck walks into a bar. the manager kicks him out considering animals are not allowed in the bar.

Why did your ears get blasted with sound? You never turned the volume down..

People say that shit don't stink But shit does stink It stinks like shit!

Why did the boy jizz?...........he was getting a blowjob!!!

Black people

If you see Chuck Norris you should probably tell him hey for me.

Yo mama's so white, she's an albino!

A man walks into a bar. Now he needs stitches on his forehead because he was walking pretty fast

What did dick Cheney say to his friend that he accidentally shot in the face while quail hunting? Sorry for shooting you in the face

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock-eater.

What happened when the Irish ran out of potatoes? Millions starved.

Miss Hoolie: Hello, PC Plum. What's the story in Balamory? PC Plum: I'm arresting you for the sexual molestation of twenty children.

Q:What does a virgin and a penny both have in common? A:Guys don't want them.

knock knock who's there peedo peedo who scissors

ALCATRAZ IS REOPENED!

why did the chicen cross the road? because it saw an excellent deal on hair products on the other side of the street.

what is purple and fly? - a purple flying.

what is the biggest lie in the whole world? -please drink responsibly

how do jews pay for a $1200 Tv. they play $1000.

What do Ethiopians do at night? Starve.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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