A Mime travels to Africa for a vacation. He meets a Zebra in his travels and the Zebra says "Hey we both are wearing black and white stripes!" The Mime did not understand the Zebra because he cannot talk his language so he continues on with his vacation.

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There is a wire, Let's put it on fire, The fire spread so did your legs, Now were both lying dead on your bed.

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;iub

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A man visits his doctor for an annual checkup. "Doc, I feel great! I'm running 5 miles a day, I just got promoted at work, and sex with my wife has never been better!" A few weeks later, his doctor calls him in. When he arrives, the doctor looks at him grimly. "I have some bad news. You have lung cancer." "But how? I don't smoke. My wife doesn't smoke. I have never felt better." The doctor pats him on the back, reassuringly. "This may be true, but you still have lung cancer."

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a man checks his brand new cellphone to see if he has a text message... He has cancer

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What happened to timmy? He had downsyndrome and walked off a cliff

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Why does the chicken cross the road? 4

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why did the boy die because he got ran over by a tractor

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What's worse than accidentally flooding your bathroom? A Tsunami

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What did the agnostic say when he turned blue? He said "wow why am I blue?"

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david weres the slug gone

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Why couldnt the car move? It got blown up by a tank.

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Why did twenty mexicans run down a hill? There was a marathon in the area.

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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Knock, knock. "Who's there?" "Jehovah's Witness." "Jehovah's witness, who?" "Just Jehovah's Witness. Your doorbell is not working."

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what do trees like to drink? r o o t b e a r

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What's black and white and red all over? A dying zebra.

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What's brown and sticky? Shit.

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Q: What is Tarzan's favorite Christmas Carol? A: None. He was raised by gorillas, who are unlikely to have ever heard of Christmas.

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whats red and smells like blue paint? blue paint on the rag

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Knock Knock. Whos there? I am the danger! Danger who? I AM THE ONE WHO KNOCKS!

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http://i.imgur.com/BJsbT.jpg

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I'm Batman.

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What's liquid, clear, and tastes like water? H20

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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