Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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How do you make a little boy cry? You rape his dog

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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just a man and his thoughts....and a smart phone app, and a loving family, thats not the point.

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What did the Carbon atom say to the Oxygen atom? Nothing, basic elements are incapable of speech. It requires a culmination of many atoms to form a living human capable of speaking to another human.

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A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

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Two girls were taken away mysteriously in the night. The next day, no one cared because they were orphans.

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What is black and white and red all over. A pile of dead zebras

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what do you call a black clerk? one of the 2 billion people with a job, u bum!

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A boy walks into a shop He buys some sweets.

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What's worse than no christmas? Taking a chainsaw to the face.

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Who did you see last night? Nobody, no one wants to see you.

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Cool Brian

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What happens if George Washington is still alive? World population increases by 1

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What the man from the arapahoe tribe say to the mexican who was living in a trash bag? You should try a hotel room. They comfortably sleep 67-493 mexicans.

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What do you get when John pulls your toe off the waterfall and takes three from an caramel? -6 to the power of golf.

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so a jew walks into a bar and leaves at 9:00 becuase he has work in the morning.

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Whats green, has 4 legs and falls out a tree? A pool table

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Whats the difference between babies and a dart board? Dart boards dont bleed

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why didn't the girl show up for school? because she was dead

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roses are red violets are blue that's just the way god made them

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Once a upon a midnight haven. Along came a cow name Mr. Maven. For they say the cow was very lucky. But oh what a day for something very mucky. Oh ye the coming of Mr. Maven and his milk. And for every cereal there will be silk. But wait isn't Mr. Maven a guy? How can you milk him even if you try? I don't know, just sounds cool.

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Q. Where's your nan???? A. In my closet

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A man walks into a bar Ouch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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