A man walks into the doctor's office and says "I'm not feeling to good doc." and the doctor says "Thats because you have a fatal brain tumor and probably don't have too long to live."

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's comfy and easy to wear? Shorts.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do dogs and whales have in common? They both live in the ocean. Apart from the dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Two Chavs jump off a clift who wins? Neither the sport of Tomb stoning is considered non competitive much like jogging

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Well Erron, its your lucky day then. I wont even ask what a cream pie is.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the friend say to the other friend? A. Hi friend.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

1d

thumb_up thumb_down -25

roses are red violets are blue no seriously they are

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How do you kill a shark blindfolded? You untie the blindfold.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Lol, thats funny, sorry for asking, but is your eye doing better? Was their IQ test the same one you get when you enter their site?

thumb_up thumb_down -27

"One day this man walks out of his house to go to work. He sees this snail on his porch. So he picks it up and chucks it over his roof, into the back yard. Snail bounces off a rock, cracks its shell all to ****, and lands in the grass. Snail lies there dying. But it doesn't die. It eats some grass. Slowly heals. Grows a new shell. And after a while it can crawl again. One day the snail up and heads back to the front of the house. Finally, after a year, the little guy crawls back on the porch. Right then, the man walks out to go to work and sees this snail again. So he says to it, 'What the f uck's your problem?'" -Training Day

thumb_up thumb_down -27

If an orange is orange then why isn't a banana called a yellow? Because the word 'banana' comes from the Arabic word for finger as it obviously resembles a finger. The person that named the orange was equally lazy, but just not Arabic.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why was the black man sad? Because his wife and children had been killed in a freak car accident while he had been driving.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

andrew wagner

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Elephant. Elephant who? Seatbelt.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did the Jewish man say to the Shia faction Muslim man? Even though we have different views on god and religion I value your friendship more than my religous views.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A man comes home to find his wife sleeping with another woman. He molests them both.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

yo mama has one big titty and one small titty and the call the bitch paul

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What happened when the Irish ran out of potatoes? Millions starved.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Q: What does one man with alzheimer's say to the other man with alzheimer's. A: Purple, because magic doesn't go through chickens.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

K

thumb_up thumb_down -29

How can you tell if a man is choking? Stick a fridge down his throat

thumb_up thumb_down -29

what's gay as AIDS? The way you got it

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Whats worse than it raining on your birthday? 911

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops