When life gives you ponies... get a new life!

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What did John's girlfriend get him for their 5 year anniversary? Proactive because his acne bothers her.

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What do you call a girl who can run faster than me? Virgin

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Why did Jimmy never like old people? Because he was abused as a child by one.

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What's worse than getting an erection in church Getting an erection while naked in church

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<=3 penis

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What is black, white, and red all over A penguin in a blender

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How many clowns fit in a car? Depends how many get in the car.

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why didnt Timmy get anything for Christmas?His mom told santa he was very naughty that year

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what is the differance between a toyata and a van full of dead babies I dont own a toyata

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Yo mama so fat , when she went to the doctors office and stepped on the scale they said please, your weight, not your phone number .

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Religionh

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Q.whats black and white and red all over A. half a zebra

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Q: what's the difference between a young, geeky kid living in Wisconsin's basketball and Yao Ming's basketball? A: young, geeky kids cannot live in Wisconsin's basketball. Wisconsin is a state, and states cannot own objects because they aren't sentient beings. And Yao Ming's basketball... is just a regular basketball that happens to be owned by Yao Ming.

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Boy, do I love chicken strips. Sometimes, when I’m home alone, I’ll take some chicken strips fresh out of the oven and rub them in my scalp. It doesn’t do much for my hair health, but I like the way they feel running through my strands of hair. The flakey coating, smooth white meat, and warmth. Yum.

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Why is it interesting to watch your mum shower? It's Not, its sick you pervert

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A patient goes to the doctor. The doctor says I have bad news and even worse news. The patient says "What's the bad news?" The doctor says "You only have 24 hours to live." The patient says "Oh my gosh what could possibly be worse than that?!" The doctor says "Well...we've been trying to contact you since yesterday..."

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here's a chuck norris fact: Chuck Norris is 5'10 and lost to bruce lee!

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-my friend Cassie is coming over - oh is she cute? -yea but she's not my type -oh that's understandable then

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What do you call the worst band ever? Nickelback.

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Why didn't the girl get on the school bus? It was Sunday.

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I like my coffe like my women Without a Penis

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How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

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What did the Jew say to the German? He said hello.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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