Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

What if there were no hypothetical questions?

Womens' sports

why did chuck norris walk on water? because he's chuck norris

What's worse than finding a worm in your Holocaust? Oh, wait, I said it wrong...

What salad was served in the salad bar on the Titanic? Probably a selection of green leaves, radishes, cucumber, sliced hard boiled egg and cherry tomatoes, topped with cress, mixed seeds and a delicate dressing.

A man walks into a bar. He enjoys a few quiet drinks with friends before returning home to his loving family.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a convicted rapist.

What do you call a sheep with big teeth? Mitch

A horse walks into a bar. The waiter asks: 'Why the long face?' The horse, not understanding English, takes a crap on the floor and walks out.

Caller: Is your fridge running! Callee: ... umm yes? Caller: I guess you don't need my services. Thanks Callee: ok bye

what did the man say to his dog? sex. -teagan doherty

Your mother's breath smells so bad that it just doesn't smell very good at all.

Why did the downy jump off a cliff? I told him to.

Why was bobby late for school? Because he drove off a bridge.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

There were three men standing outside. They were enjoying the nice weather.

Q: What was the pirate movie rated? A: PG-13 for violence and brief nudity.

There is more than one way to skin a cat. I used a potato skin peeler.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "I have a gambling problem."

Why did the two blondes decide to ride in one car? Because it's more environmentally friendly than taking two cars.

Q. What did the dog say to the cat? A. Ruff.

How many kids does Buzz Light Year have? To infinity and beyond!!

Why did Oliver fall? He shot himself.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...