okay so this guy walks into the bar and says DON BE STUPE SHE SPIT GOOD AND EVERYTHIN. why did he say that. BECAUSE EVERYBODY HATES HIS SPIT

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What's the best part of having sex with twenty eight year olds? They are of the legal age

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Two blondes and a brunnett walk into a bar. Remarkably, there was nothing else notable about any of them.

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I've got ninety-nine problems, all of them very diverse and possibly involving women.

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Why did the whale rape a guy? He wanted to see what would happen.

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Why doesn't God like fruitcake? Because God doesn't exist.

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What does a scouter say about his power level? It's over 9'000!!!!!!!!!

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A Priest, a Rabbi and an Imam were having dinner together at a local restaurant. Which caused a group of Republicans sitting nearby to ask for another table.

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A bear eats some honey. I'm not really sure why and I've never seen a bear eat honey in real life so I don't really know if the bear actually ate any.

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don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

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How did Clumsy Clearance eat shit? He was in the Human Centipede.

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its's not rape if you yell "suprise!"

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doctor,doctor my eyesight is getting worse, you are certainly right, this is the post office

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What do you do if you see a black man in your backyard with a bullet wound in his head? Take him to the hospital.

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Thank you so much Nero, I have read it and I am crying because I am happy, at first I was worried because I have never cried out of happiness before. But its over. Nero, you underestimate yourself a lot, promise me we will work with that together, sometimes you almost convince me you are as inferior as you say, but then you get out of your shell of doubt your past has caused in you (its not you when you doubt yourself its what they put in you), you are always there when people need you, teach me hypnosis someday and let me remove that part of you which does not allow you to believe in yourself. Dont reply Nero, calm down and sleep, I feel you are allright, I just know.

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Now I have been typing without even thinking about that, and you have been following me.

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What's the difference between men and women? I really can't tell anymore, there's so many goddamn transvestites.

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why did the mom beat up her son with downs because he was matt daly

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A chicken walks into asda/walmart The person at the counter says: "What can I get you?" The chicken says: "Cluck"

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There was a hundred dollar note lying flat on the ground. The homeless guy didn't pick it up and walked on because he didn't see it.

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this site is an antijoke

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what is the difference between a car salesman and a lawyer? a car salesman sells cars to people while a lawyer is an expert in law.

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nobody move, or i'll kill myself, then her!

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Straight man: Gays can't have babies so they shouldn't be allowed to have sex. Gay man: But you got a vasectomy last year, so you can't make babies either. The straight man sees the irony, realizes how judgmental he has been and never has sex again because he maintains his opinion that gays shouldn't have sex.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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