Why'd The Little Kid Drop His Ice Cream Cone? Because He Witnessed His Mom get Raped in front of his house by the man driving the ice cream truck and the realized that he was licking frozen semen......

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Why did jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms or legs Knock knock Who's there? Not jimmy

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Why does a man wake up every morning to do the same job over again? Because, wait... what the heck kind of a question is that?

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A bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "Can I have... ...a beer." The bartender asks, "What's with the large pause?" To which the bear replies, "I have... ...a speech impediment."

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Q: How is a cloud like orange juice? A: Neither have wheels.

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When life gives you melons. You're not dyslexic because you can probably tell the difference between a lemon and melon because they look so different.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Actually, no they're not. They're VIOLET. That's why they're called that. If they were blue, they would be called "Blues", or something of a similar nature. Don't be dumb.

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What happens when you give a Jew an iPhone? He says thank you and gives you a hug.

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A muslim walks pass a bomb shop on his way to the international peace club.

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What do Kim Kardashian and a broken-down horse have in common? They will both eat oats out of your hand.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Q: How do you call a group of animals? A: Llama.

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What did the president do for the people? ...

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What's worst than realizing your mom is actually a transvestite? Simultaneously realizing this means you are adopted

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive a car? Because she was a woman.

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Knock Knock! Whos there? The Game!

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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I couldnt remember who Rhiana used to date. Then it hit me.

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Q: Why was the boy so sad? A: His parents were just killed in a car wreck, therefore orphaning him and his five brothers and sisters and leaving them with no money, food, or shelter due to lack of steady income and the fact that their house had been foreclosed on.

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dude... what would you do if i punched you in the face? i would pee on you

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How do you get a clown to shut up? Hit him in the face with an axe

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What's the difference between Wolfjob and a Jew? Wolfjob is attractive.

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A white man walks down an alley and sees two black men. They say hello and then are on their way.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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