Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Being caught by the store manager, arrested, convicted, and thrown into jail for petty theft and then getting anally raped for the next 3 months all because you wanted to check an apple without paying for it.

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how did the fat man get up the stairs he walked

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Why did the turtle cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

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How do you get a jewish girls number check her wrist

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How do you knock a clown off a swing? Hit it with an axe multiple times.

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A man walks into a bar, he asks if the bartender knows where Starbucks is. The bartender finds this exceptable and shows him the way.

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What did one socially awkward kid say to another socially awkward kid? Nothing

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Two hippos are in a lake with water up to their eyes. One of them then says, "i keep thinking it's tueday"

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Sorry babe, even if I was I would not tell you, the entire place is surrounded, but within enough of a distance, so we will plant a nice setup around the green shack so everyone assumes his deal was some solo operation, if someone else is heading at his direction now, you are gonna get busted, so you better stay down.

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First joke of the most-disliked area; 9/11 joke. First joke of the most popular area; Holocaust joke. "You shouldn't joke about 9/11 you sick bastard people died" -Said all Americans ever.

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why did the man fart? because he felt like it.

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How to condom style ayyyyyy sexy horsey how how how how how to condom style

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Winter

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What's the difference between an ostridge? It can neither fly.

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Your boat breaks down on the highway. How many squirrels does it take to eat a bannana? Squirrels do not eat bannanas but it would probably take a monkey 1.5 milliseconds.

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A blonde girl walks into a hairdressers and asks for a slight trim. She leaves the hairdressers fairly happy with the result although she was unhappy with the price which she later concluded was most likely because of the rising inflation. However overall she felt it had been a successful outing.

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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Random link time! http://www.booksie.com/thrillers/novel/declan_mckimm/pure-evil

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What's worse than a pimple? Finding out it's a botfly.

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What's worse than losing a basketball game by 1 point? Dying of lukemia.

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Rebecca Black.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your son has been in a car accident and has died.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It couldnt because a chicken was obscuring its path.

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A black man burned down my house. It was on minecraft you racist!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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