Why did the man fall of his bike? He wasn't on his bike, i drowned him yesterday.

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Knock Knock Whos there? It was the unexpected arrival of his wifes lover who'd been having an affair with her for over a year She thought her husband would be out and forgot to tell him not to come The husband started breaking down in tears whilst throwing insults at both of them, grabbing the man by his collar and throwing him on the ground he started to kick his head in The man died and the husband and wife divorced, theres now a bench in the mans local park dedicated to him.

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A boy walks into a bar. Because he was under-age, security kicked him out as soon as possible and alerted his parents.

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Q: Why did Little Suzie fall off of the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Little Suzie!

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They see me rolling' Up my sleeves for some volunteer work at the local shelter

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Q. have you seen Helen Keller house A. niether has she

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When is a door not a door? Never, a door is an inanimate object and is thus incapable of transforming.

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What did the lawyer say to a lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? Names.

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what did the homeless man get for christmas.......................nothing

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A buddhist,islamist and a prohibitionist walk into a bar.

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Q: Why are Cats called Lolcat? A: They forgot to put "i" between l & c

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Knock knock, Who's there The delivery man The delivery man who Just take this package

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What color do you get when you mix blue and red? Purple.

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What do you call a 5 year old with no friends? A sandy hook survivor

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What'd the left nut say to the right nut? How's it hangin?

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Where is one place everyone eventually goes to rest? A cemetery.

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What did the homeless guy get for Christmas? Nothing, he's homeless.

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Why was sally mopping the floor? Because she was a slave

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What do you call a building full of black people Jail

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Hey, Batman Yeah? Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents!

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After pursuing a speeding vehicle for 10km at speeds ranging from 120 - 160km/h, the police officer managed to stop the driver. The driver of the vehicle rolled down the window and asked, "What seems to be the problem officer?" to which the police officer replied, "It sounds like one of your cylinders is firing incorrectly, you have a fairly large amount of carbon build-up on and around your exhaust pipe."

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I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

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Do you have to make frequent trips to the bathroom? Do you have a weak or broken stream? Do you leave the bathroom feeling satisfied? Do your frequent trips to the bathroom interrupt everyday activities? Well you should take Lunesta and just sleep. Then you wouldn't have this problem.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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