Your mom is so poor that she can't even pay attention.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: So it could get hit by a car, to prove that chickens have free will, and have every right to cross a road without any particualar reason.

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What did the cow say to the chicken? Moo. Moral: Cuckoo!

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Knock knock I don't play games, go away! Knock knock How did you get in my house? Knock knock Stay back I have a weapon! Knock knock What are you!!! Knock knock Oh god, someone please help! Knock knock What do you want, I can give you money. Knock knock Just don't hurt my family, please. Knock knock!!! WHO'S THERE!!! I am.

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What is worst than a1000 baby's stapled to a tree? 1 baby stapled to 1000 trees.

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What's black and has the texture of tar? Molasses

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A Muslim, a Jew and a Christian are on an airplane talking about religion. The Jew tells the Christian he believes in a single holy entity. The Christian says he believe Christ is the Son of that very same entity. The Muslim says "When can I get out of this room?" because he's been detained at the airport due to religious profiling.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? No, This is Patrick.

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Q:how do you make a rockstar cry? A: hit him with a breifcase

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How do you get an Orphan's hands to bleed? Tell them to clap till daddy gets home.

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What do a fish and a frog have in common? They can both live in water. Its a well known fact.

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Why did the fat guy smell bad? He just farted diarrhea.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Its John

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What's brown and ryhmes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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did you know towels can cause dry skin?

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Q: What do you call a guy that is smart? A: A SMART Guy.

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Why did the Mexican cross the river? For an opportunity at a better life for himself and his loved ones.

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Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Well, he was dangerously fatigued from having weeped passionately the entire night in the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of 20 years and consequently finding out that his only daughter was in a tragic school bus accident.

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You know what's bad? Running over a baby with a truck. You know what's worse? Skidding on it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? On a fundamental level, it was pursuing evolutionary instincts, perhaps a half-bored interest in food.

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A Polish man is walking down the street carrying a brown paper bag. He runs into one of his buddies, who asks, "Hey! What's in the bag?" The man tells his friend that he has some fish in the bag. His friend says, "Well, I'll make you a bet. If I can guess how many fish you have in the bag, you'll have to give me one." The man replies, "I'm sorry, my friend, but gambling is against my morals, especially when my family's only nutrition for the week is on the line."

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Why was the Energizer Bunny arrested? He was found guilty of two acts of murder in the first degree.

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yo momma is so poor that she may not be abe to accumulate the right amount of revenue necessary for your college funding.

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why did joe drop his clock? billy ran into him, therfore making the clock wobble in his hand until it fell at 34 mph.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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