Why couldn't Hellen Keller watch TV? Because at 19 months she contracted what is believed to be scarlet fever which caused an acute congestion of the stomach and brain which caused her to loose sight and hearing.

two tomatos walked over the road and..... just kidding tomatos can't walk.

Knock Knock Who's There Your doctor... You have Aids

Why did the spoon say hi to the fork? To initiate a conversation.

Q: Why Did The Family Eat Olive Garden For Dinner A: Because it was a simple way to please everyone but letting them choose their own meal

from south park what do u call a jew on a rope no one ever said the answer, so my answer is a jew on a rope.

A black man walks into KFC. the whole room..THE GAME.

Why is an elephant gray Because it's GRAY!!! duh

A man is flailing his arms in the ocean. Help me, I'm drowning!, he screams. Some dude runs into the water, drags the man out, and is proclaimed a Hero.

how did santa ruin christmas? he didnt put presents under familys tree's

Q: Buttsex? A: Butsex!

A Blonde arives at the airport late, and misses her flight. The airline provides her with a complimentary ticket for a later flight and she departs on that.

A man comes home to find his wife sleeping with another woman. He molests them both.

A christian and an atheist are in a bar. The christian says "if you don't accept Jesus Christ as your lord and savior you will go to hell." The atheist replies "No I won't."

Roses are grey, violets are grey, everything is grey, i'm a dog.

whats better than sex with a 12 year old?? nothing

How types of people are there? One, we are the only homo sapiens.

Your mom is so fat that I worry she may develop diabetes.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Armando masturbated

Why did your ears get blasted with sound? You never turned the volume down..

What is 8===D- ? A jew with a lip piercing.

I wont vouch for anybody right now, but nobody I know would attack anyone, I know I can be overly sensitive at times, but its not fun anymore, stop that.

mom.what is red and green? dad. what? mom. your mama dad. you Mack me cry mom gooooooooooooooooood girl. mom have you seen gmom mom.no dad. your mom killed her girl. rely mom. yes girl.thanks she suck dick for money and now i have to get a new bed so thanks mom.ya dad. so you want to be dead mom and girl. or u want to be dead dad. help me plz nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo mom.yes girl yes

How many men does it take to screw in a lightbulb...1 How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb...2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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