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Have I ever told you that you looked beautiful? No. Ok, good.

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Q: What's grey and rocky? A: A grey rocking hair

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How do you kill two birds with one stone. You don't its not humanly possible because birds cannot be killed with rocks.

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What is red, blue, green, and pink, tie died, and alive? Nothing.

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How do you kill half the Mexican population? through a penny of a cliff. How do you kill the other half? Tell them its still down there.

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You tell your mom she's a bitch and she later commits suicide by shooting herself in the head . Now, what's the only thing ductape can't fix? Your moms skull.

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What do you call A potato who is covered in red refrigerators and is known as a potato. Fallafal

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Q. What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A. Robin, get in the car.

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What's the best thing about The Pixies? Their music.

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how many dead babies can you fit into a blender? 17 how do you get them out? Tortilla chips, but you'd be arrested by that time anyway because you just murdered 17 babies

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A man wearing a chicken t-shirt and holding a pair of dentures walks into the Youtube headquarters, then immediately walks out in fear of getting a copyright strike.

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What's the difference between a brick and Ricky? A brick gets laid and has a higher iq

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Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Well, he was dangerously fatigued from having weeped passionately the entire night in the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of 20 years and consequently finding out that his only daughter was in a tragic school bus accident.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere. - Blake Woodman

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a burglar walks in a house the alarm goes off and the police come

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? I don't know, that's why I was asking.

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what do gay people eat?? food

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what's worse than the Holocaust. Finding two worms in your apple.

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Why was the boy hanging from the ceiling? He was sad

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How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

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A man says to a boy. I bet you I can jump over that mountain. The boy wins the bet because it is a physical impossibility to jump over a mountain.

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Because he was bringing food to support his wife and 3 kids whom were very hungry and needed it to survive.

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whats the difference between a male porsche driver and a porcupine? with porcupines,the pricks are on the outside.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops