Pineapple.

What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

John: I just ran over a cat... Just kidding! It was your mum.

Knock Knock Not Yet

why did the man fall off his bike? He got shot by the navy seals, He was a highly decorated terrorist.

Q: Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice for two hours? A: Because she was dead.

(Pretend that your adopted, and no one loves you) Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents.

*ahem* what? what. oh I thought you said something

A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

There once was a baby named Paul Bunyan who was as big as a house. His mother died at childbirth.

What makes you hate life and feel good at the same time? A rapist.

What's black and crawls around on eight legs? An octopus that just inked itself.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Today i started to think lucas was homosexuaI.. I am scared

My wife came up to me and said, "I want you to make me scream with 2 fingers!" So I poked her in the eyes!

Why did the clown fall out of the helicopter?? Gravity

what do you call a gay guy in a sleeping bag? a fruit roll-up. GET IT? because gay guys like fruit roll-ups.

What is makes you more happy to see than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed up as a clown.

How many cops does it take to change a lightb- [Beaten to death by cops]

So, there was two successful business men at a social gathering when one leans in to the other to comment, "Hey, that women over there, she looks like your wife!" to which the other one replies, "That is my wife."

Three men went into a bar; one was blind, another deaf and the third was mute. The blind guy said "Did you SEE that?" The deaf guy said "WHAT?" And the mute said "...."

Why did the chicken itch it's bum? Cause it's bum was itchy

5 - samios in a wheelchair.

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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