What's worse than getting stabbed? Getting stabbed twice. What's worse than getting stabbed twice? Getting stabbed three times. What's worse than gettin..... Why does it matter?!?!?! U should be dead by then!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the waiter lose his job? Because he was a fish

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's worse than winning a gold medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

An Asian man, a black man, and a gay man walk into a bar. They all buy the same drink, are charged the same price and say " We are all equal! " They then continue on with their days normaly.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A green-painted man walked into a bar and confused a blonde, bar-tending horse with a tale of rape in the holocaust involving an amputee child riding a fridge on a plane with a pig, a duck, a chicken, a lawyer and countless men of various ethnicities, religious faiths and sexual persuasions. Together, they changed a lightbulb, ate wormy apples and agreed upon the colour of roses and violets respectively.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Roses are red Violets are blue I have ADD Oooh a cloud

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I was watching two muffins baking in an oven. One said to the other, "Wow, it's hot in here." The other one said "Wow! A talking muffin!" I went to my psychiatrist the next day, to increase the dosage on my medication.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

have you seen Britney Spears lately? no. i wouldn't expect you to since she is a pop sensation and you are just a regular person trying to find your way in this world

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was the 2-year-old girl found dead in the swamp? Her mom was Casey Anthony.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How many men does it take to wallpaper a room? It depends on how big the room is and, to a lesser extent, how wide the strips of wallpaper are. Also factor in variables such as ambient humidity.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why didn't the man have a vagina? Trick Question. Everybody has a vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

once upon a time joey was on a roller coaster. Joey fell off the roller coaster and died.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was Tigger looking in the toilet? He was looking for pooh

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why couldn't Sally ride a bike? She was disabled

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What is stupid? I would say you but these jokes are worse.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was the boy late for dinner? He got in the van.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

The indistinguishable bug corrupts a bond arrow.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the airplane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Roses are red. My name is dave. This poem makes no sense. Microwave.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How many licks does it take to get to center of a tootsie pop? pickles, 7:00 pm, wood, shoulder pain

thumb_up thumb_down +9

bologna

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How do you drown a blonde? You hold her head under water until water gets into her lungs and she cant breathe.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

-What do you call it when a female and male are together? - A very serious relationship.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a man who has been run over by a car? An Ambulance

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops