why did the kid cross the road he didnt he had no legs

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A man goes to the doctor and is told, "you have cancer." He then spends his last days writing a bucket list, but losing his leg in a wood chipper before he could complete a single item on his list

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What smells bad and is black, A very dirty dead decomposing body.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. A family is tied-up and screaming for help in my basement.

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Why is paper white? Cause that's how they make paper.

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I scream, You scream, The police come, It's awkward.

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Bumsniffer

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? monkey see monkey do why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? it lost its footing why did the girl fall down? she was hit by four monkeys and a refridgerator

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Why did the ship crash into Italy? Because a woman took over driving it!

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What did Little Jimmie say to his mom when he got home frome school? Nothing his moms dead.

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what do you do to gay guy who wants to have anal sex with you? beat him with a steel baseball bat in his face.

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Why was the bus driver sad? The kid with the icecream had c4 strapped to his chest.

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Why did the clown go to jail? For 23 charges of rape and murder.

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What do you call a gay couple with jobs and a kid?? Responsible.

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A homeless guy gets done with his daily work. where does he go? nowhere he is homeless...

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What is the answer to the question of life? Over 9000

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What do you call a zebra without stripes? A stripeless zebra.

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What did the white guy say to the black guy? What's up?

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John has 7 apples and Lisa has 4 apples John eats 3 apples and Lisa eats 1 apple and give another to John Their diets lacks various essential nutrients

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What did walt disney say to the Jew? Nothing. Walt Disney didn't know the man was Jewish and didn't have time to make himself acquainted with the fellow.

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What do you do If you can't afford a hair cut? Don't get one.

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What's the difference between Rob Schnieder and Jelly Beans? Someone besides Adam Sandler likes Jelly Beans.

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Why couldn't the man see the camoflague iguana He could.

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Sex positions (and other related things), never took off... 1. The 96 2. The mission (impossible) position. 3. The Tangoers party (swingers? The fack is that?) 4.Nasal. 5. Bed waltz (requires amazing dancing skills and multitasking, now they just call everything for "bed waltz" to show off) 6.Blind Date take uno (hard to find two blind people and make sure they meet each other and have a good time by themselves). 7. GILFS take one (I mean there could be many hot grandmas out there, but "Guns Id Like For Shooting", was not too popular due accidents)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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