Why do cats burp quietly, because they aren't men

whats fat and ugly ? aidan slattery

once there where 3 guys on a beach. they found a bottle and a fetis came out.. later they found out 2 of the 3 had cancer and the 3rd was a vegetable.

whats red and falls from a tree an apple

Yo mama is so ugly that the devil warships her.

Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

A man is walking on the beach, he trips on a mystical lamp and dusts i off a little. turns out that it was just a lamp, he droped it back on the sand and was arrested for littering.

Why was Susie crying? There was a frog stapled to her face.

What is Oedipus' favorite tv show! How I Met Your Mother

I was playing Black Ops online, my wife turned it off in the middle of the game....I killed her

how do you get blondes to drown? stick a mirror to the bottom of the pool

What's bue and sticky? -A blue stick.

A student exclaimed "This test is a piece of cake!" He ate it.

What did the doctor say to his patient? You were supposed to die 12 seconds ago....

How does camon Die? He kills himself because he didnt make it into the marine corps

How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit him with an ax.

A Rock accidentally fed a giraffe his fetuses conceived by a box of glue from Jewish Heritage that was made from marker sharpeners that fed paper to elephants while strumming a box of tissues to wipe up the mess from a box of chocolates Forest Gump feeds on your soul while a rock accidentally feeds a giraffe.

Why was the blond stupid? She wasnt, its just that everyone loves stereotypes

What's funnier than the holocaust? Pretty much everything, the killing of 6 million people was a horrible part of our world's history, and is no laughing matter.

A black man walks in to a 7 Eleven with a gun in his left pocket. He innocently walks over to the place where they keep all the hostess treats, and decides to purchase a pack of crumb donuts. The gun was purely for self defense, it was a bad neighborhood.

-my friend Cassie is coming over - oh is she cute? -yea but she's not my type -oh that's understandable then

Why couldn't the man read? Because he was illiterate

What did Iran say to Israel? ALLLLAHH

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I am couler-blind, and poetry is gay

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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