I'm an old man with Alzheimer's. Ok I'm going to tell you a little story. Well i was walking down the road bout 36 sum odd years ago and the next thing i knew i was........... Hmmm.... i wonder whats in the fridge...

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How do you make a plumber cry? Shit a brick.

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What do you get when you cross a celebrity with drugs? A highly probable circumstance.

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Lil Wayne

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What's the difference between a Mustang and a sack of dead babies? I don't have a sack of dead babies in my garage.

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Why is Taylor sad? Because she's the middle of a human centipede.

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Fine, just remember that I want to help you, but you cannot ask me for help, and then throw a shitstorm of accusations at me, I have never worked for the feds and never will, I know nothing about their code of operations nor... Anything really. Let me give you an advice, I know that at least two people you trusted deeply betrayed you, but if you are not going to trust anyone again, then leave point zero while you still can do so alive. And no babe, this is not a threat, its advice.

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anti-joke.com

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What does God say when a balck person is person is borned? "Another burnt one"

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penis

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Q: What is red and green and goes 100/mph? A: A frog in a blender

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Yo mama's so fat, she's at risk for a number of obesity related disseases, including diabetes, hypertension, and heart dissease.

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Romeny or Obama? Obamney

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What's under the first mate? The second mate.

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Why can't black people be in a talent show? Because they'll steal the show.

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Kumquats Daffodils Alka-Seltzer Serendipity Dewey Decimal System Buccaneer Avuncular Pantaloons Weasels Alligator Chewbacca Sasquatch

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Q: What did the dog say to the cat? A: animals don't talk

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knock knock who's there auntie auntie who? anti-joke

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A man became infected with Staphylococcal Food Poisoning. The doctor said, "You only have 24 hours to live." He died 24 hours later.

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What do women and airplanes have in common? They both have cockpits!

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what's the difference between a dead baby and a lamborghini? I don't have a lamborghini in my garage!

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Q: what did the dad get for playing baseball with his son? A: a line drive to his balls

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Why is six afraid of seven. Because seven is a rapist.

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who can beat up superman doomsday, duh, he killed him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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