Why didn't the girl make the basketball team? She has no arms or legs.

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Why did the teacher get mad at the student? Because he ran over him with a car.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet.

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Why wasn't the man wearing a life vest? Because he was sleeping.

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im in stttttttttiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiittttttttttttttttttccccccccccccchhhhhhhhhhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesssssssssssss

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

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Add William Wright On Facebook Answer- www.facebook.com/public/William-Wright

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What did Jean Luc Picard say to Data when he saw a broken Janome Overlocker? Make it Sew

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what did the alcholic get his children for christman, nothing i lied about the children. Another joke by rangler thumbs up for more.

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Girl: Want to stay over at mine tonight? Guy: Yeah I'd love to! Girl: Tough, you can't

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"Happy Father's Day!" said the little boy to the old man. The old man broke out in tears because he had always wanted to be a father.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She was capable of loving and caring for a dog.

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what did the crocodile say to the fish? OMNOMNOMNOMNOM!! and then the fish swam away because of the the weird noise the crock was making...

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What do you get when you mix a baby and a fork? An abortion.

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Knock, knock -Who's there? Help -Help who? Im dying of lukemia

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How do you confuse Hellen Keller? You write a really difficult riddle in braille and tell her to solve it.

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mom:why oh why are you such an idiotic nuisance? bobby:THATS HOW YOU WANTED ME BORN!!REMEMBER?you asked the doctor to put something in me to make me so stupid i wouldnt remember WHO gave birth to me!!

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Why did the cow cross the road? It was escorted by its owner to get to the slaughter-house.

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What did the rapist say before the little girl got in the van? Get in the van

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what did the cat say to the monkey meow then he got hit by a car

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Whats worse than getting punched in the balls? Getting punched in the balls twice.

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If life gives you lemons, steal the declaration of independance and use the lemons and a hair dryer to reveal the numbers on the back. Then enbark on an epic journey that ends with the discovery of the templars treasure. Lastly, use the money you earned to buy some lemons and make some lemonade.

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? The Holocaust is not an idea of the slightest humor at all. Millions of innocent civilians were slaughtered, millions more were sent to brutal concentration camps where they would fight for a crumb of food on the ground and get terribly punished for it, and live their whole lives in pain, torture, and starvation, millions more were sent to concentration camps then murdered, and millions of people, including children were left without family or anywhere to live. On top of that, their whole lives they were mistreated for their differences, and never got to live up to their dreams because of this horrifying event. It left the world in shock for years after, and scars of the event still live on in present-day families whose ancestors were harmed in the Holocaust. The terrible memory of it will never leave this Earth.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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