What's sad about four black people going over in a cliff in Cadillac? It was my Cadillac.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you call Bilbo Baggins when you use him for pleasure? Dildo Baggins

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why can't the little girl ride a bike? She has Osteoporosis and falling would shatter her bones.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you get when you cross a rusty nail and a foot? Tetanus

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did billy have a bruse? Because he got smacked with a belt. -Louis

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Thank you so much Nero, I have read it and I am crying because I am happy, at first I was worried because I have never cried out of happiness before. But its over. Nero, you underestimate yourself a lot, promise me we will work with that together, sometimes you almost convince me you are as inferior as you say, but then you get out of your shell of doubt your past has caused in you (its not you when you doubt yourself its what they put in you), you are always there when people need you, teach me hypnosis someday and let me remove that part of you which does not allow you to believe in yourself. Dont reply Nero, calm down and sleep, I feel you are allright, I just know.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q: What's brown and looks like a weasel? A: A weasel.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q:what's black and white and red all over? A:a panda bear that's been shot in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How do you count all the jews in a village? The United States Census Bureau usually has reliable data so I would start there

thumb_up thumb_down -24

I don't know what was a bigger disappointment, the series finale of "Lost" or--sorry I thought I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A man walks into a bar. He sees two horses, and about 15 other men in there which seem to have their own ethnicity and religion preferences. About 20 people on the sidelines were on anti-joke.com, writing down these jokes. About two leave at the same time, noticing that there is a horse in the bar. The man goes outside. Five swingsets are right next to each other, and some kids with no arms or no legs cannot swing. They are also being called names. An old adult is climbing a telephone pole with a backpack full of bananas. Also, a boy drops his ice cream after getting hit by a bus. And at the same time, he notices that most of these are better than the holocaust. He thinks, "do I live in Crazytown?" Well, he does.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

sky's the limit said the tree a.w. j.p.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why didn't the Priest have a TV ? A black man stole it

thumb_up thumb_down -26

what did the guy say before he went to kill the other guy? Im killing you

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A neutron walks into a bar. He orders a drink and ponders why his mother gave him the name, "A neutron."

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A man asks a young woman at a party if a rag smells like chloroform. She doesn't respond because she's passed out. He takes her to a nearby bedroom, rapes her, and leaves the party promptly. He'll probably victimize many other women with this method.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Daddy look! Roses! No son, those are rhododendrons... Daddy how do you spell rhododendrons? Uh... never mind son those are roses. So... Daddy how do you spell roses? Son, never mind that is a dog. So daddy how do you spell... SHUT UP! Moral: I put a spell on you.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

a horse is running across a cliff at 54 miles per hour, against the wind. he has been running for three hours. he needs to run for 347 more kilometers before he is tired. the wind is blowing at a speed of 10 miles per hour... he wonders if he will make it when suddenly he falls off the cliff. why did he fall of the cliff? it was a retarded horse.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What did Helen Keller say when she jumped off the cliff? ........………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………...........................................................................………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………...........................................................................………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………...........................................................................………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………..................................................................... .

thumb_up thumb_down -28

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Alright then, call me sometime then.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What is worse than a sharknado? A bullcano.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

I just witnessed a horrible accident today! It was like a silent movie, but with SOUND!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are having a baby. Even Stevie Wonder saw that one coming.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops