I AM DEAD, FUCKING, SERIOUS! NOW GET OVER HERE MOMMY I WANT TO... ...Thats pretty disgusting, I was born a man, maybe an infant man, but a man regardless. So how about you stop showcasing me to people here and we just take off? I mean I am dead tired and sleepy, I would say good night, but its day here now so yeah.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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What's funny about a small child with no arms, no legs? Nothing.. Nothing at all.

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Before Super Mario existed what did people play? Instruments.

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A man walks into a bar and says ouch.

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tea with milk?

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knock knock who's there ?? the police now get out !!

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What did Batman and Robin say when they were going to the Batmobile? To the Batmobile

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have you ever heard of the mexican that went to college...no...oh me neither

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Why are black people so tall? Jesus was also black and therefore gives black people some favorable traits.

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Knock knock. Whos there? The police, your wife is dead. The police, your wife is dead who? Sir, this isn't a joke.

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Roses are red violets are blue if you were number one I"ll pick number two, if you were number two then I'll pick POO!

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What do you call a black guy running from the cops? Nothing. He was out for his morning jog and he happened to run by the police.

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- Knock knock. - Who's there? - I am. - I am who? - You are Steve. - Indeed.

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What does an Ethiopian hula-hoop with? A Cheerios JimBoto

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Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Two penguins are in the shower. One of them asks if he can have the soap. The other responds, "What am I, a telephone?"

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Moral"We all miss someone sometimes during our life, but just remain patient as you aim again, reload and hit that someone!"

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Jenny tried out for the school play. She got a callback the next day. Her father had died.

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How do you keep a secret? Kill yourself.

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What do you call a man that's very angry? A Very Angry Man.

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what happens when chuck norris does a push up. he pushes himself up

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How do pigs get hurt? They are run over by a tractor.

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Jesus Christ dude. Wait, aren't you Jewish?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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