A black and a white man enter the bar all the people jump on the black guy to beat him up when the white guy is geting free vodka

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What do you call a cow with no legs? A leg-less cow

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Why does the easter bunny hide his eggs? Because he wants to hide the fact he knocked up a chicken.

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Q:Why did the bunny run up the hill? A:Because he can't run under it.

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Roses are blue violets are red I think I'm getting drunk get me to my van

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a green man.

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Dad: i hate you. dads son:(kills him self)

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Your mom is so old that she has a lot of wrinkles because that's what happens to people when they get old.

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Why was the Mexican in pain? Someone hit him with a frying pan 5 times across the face.

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What did the girl get for Christmas? Nothing, she was homeless and dead.

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Your dad is so fat, that eventually he got on Biggest Loser and ended living a very successful life.

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What did Helen Keller say after the Iron Maiden show? Nothing, she is a mute.

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How do you call a dog with no legs? You can't call it, you have to go and pick it up.

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What's the difference between jam and jelly? Jelly is a clear or translucent fruit spread made from sweetened fruit juice, and set using naturally occurring pectin. Jam contains both fruit juice and pieces of fruit.

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How can a chicken be dirty? It can be covered in dirt!

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Whats the difference between a frog?

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What did the taxi driver say to the chicken when the chicken called a cab? "aren't you supposed to be crossing a road somewhere?" Little did the taxi driver know that the chickens license was taken away for multiple DUIs because when his wife left him he became an alcoholic mess, lost his job and became depressed. But when he called the taxi, he was on his way to a job interview. Since he never made it to his job interview he soon went broke and lost his home. Having hit rock bottom, the chicken unawarely started to cross a busy road and was ran over by that same taxi driver.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Doctor Doctor Who? Doctor Brown, I have your test results, you've HIV positive.

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the fat boy named biggins ate a twinkie, a man named scruffy came along and shot biggins, now biggins has no nose

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Why did the crocodile cross the road? It is actually highly improbable that such a large reptile would be in a residential area where such roads would exist.

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Fine, just remember that I want to help you, but you cannot ask me for help, and then throw a shitstorm of accusations at me, I have never worked for the feds and never will, I know nothing about their code of operations nor... Anything really. Let me give you an advice, I know that at least two people you trusted deeply betrayed you, but if you are not going to trust anyone again, then leave point zero while you still can do so alive. And no babe, this is not a threat, its advice.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because due to the crashing economy he feels the need tom travel far distanced for work and food to support his growing family, this causes him to take dangerous routes of travel through hazardous areas with fast moving automobiles that potential have the chance to kill or severely Maine the distressed chicken. Not only does he have to cross these roads twice a day he is also under the added pressure of many millions of people questions why he takes such chivalrous actions to save the his future descent and the steep decline in the population of chicken.

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What's the difference between a Mustang and a sack of dead babies? I don't have a sack of dead babies in my garage.

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When was George Washington born? Who the hell knows. He's older than dirt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops