How do you confuse Hellen Keller? You do not, as she is blind and deaf, and partaking in doing so would be the morally wrong thing to do.

Hey, you wanna hear a joke? The holocaust.

A man walks into a bar. He sees two horses, and about 15 other men in there which seem to have their own ethnicity and religion preferences. About 20 people on the sidelines were on anti-joke.com, writing down these jokes. About two leave at the same time, noticing that there is a horse in the bar. The man goes outside. Five swingsets are right next to each other, and some kids with no arms or no legs cannot swing. They are also being called names. An old adult is climbing a telephone pole with a backpack full of bananas. Also, a boy drops his ice cream after getting hit by a bus. And at the same time, he notices that most of these are better than the holocaust. He thinks, "do I live in Crazytown?" Well, he does.

A man asks a young woman at a party if a rag smells like chloroform. She doesn't respond because she's passed out. He takes her to a nearby bedroom, rapes her, and leaves the party promptly. He'll probably victimize many other women with this method.

There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side which would be a incontrovertible (obvious) decision.

What's the difference between a black minister and a white priest? Nothing. We're all equal in the eyes of God.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Want to hear a joke? Jerry Sandusky's innocence

A muslim and a jew meet each other in a dark ally...... they give each other strange looks because they are both in a dark ally.

A man is flailing his arms in the ocean. Help me, I'm drowning!, he screams. Some dude runs into the water, drags the man out, and is proclaimed a Hero.

A neutron walks into a bar. He orders a drink and ponders why his mother gave him the name, "A neutron."

Apple juice.

a mother: my little boy always asks me to take him to see dinosaurs...but they are extinct. me: take him to a museum you dumb bitch!

Alright then, call me sometime then.

Why was the boy depressed? A. because his whole family was slaughtered on the kitchen floor.

hot diggity dog

What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

Jimmy wanted a bike for Christmas He got cancer instead.

Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Your neighbor

What is it worse than a bee sting ? -Two bee stings What 's worse than two bee stings ? -The holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust ? -3 bee stings

your girlfriend is so dumb she is clinically retareded

It's like they always say, you get what you pay for. Unless your a woman, then you get what other men pay for.

"knock knock" "whos there" "poop" "poop who" "poop in the toilet"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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