How do you make a plumber cry? Tell him that Luigi beat him to the princess

How did the black man cross the road after 5 years of trying to and getting hit by cars every time? some1 put KFC on the other side. MrBounty44

What did the retarded asian dolphin eat for breakfast? A big bowl of shit

i used to be gay. now i am bisexual.

Why did the man cry when he was surrounded by black men? He got a call saying his mother had just died.

What did the boy with no arms, no legs, and cancer get for his birthday? AIDS

what did johnny's mom do for his 50th birthday? she died

what do jews like the most? money, because they're all greedy fat nosed cunts

Knock Knock! Who's there? The doorbell repair man.

Top ten reasons Microsoft Doors is better than Microsoft Windows. 1. Easier to open. 2. Doors do not crash... Windows does! 3. Watching pron? Your mother around? JUST SLAM THAT SHlT ON HER FACE! 4. Saves power! (Its easier to just shut and open doors) 5. Doors are a lot easier to get trough than windows. 6. When windows wishes you welcome the first time you install it, you still cant wipe your damn feet on it! 7. Its easier to surf on the internet on top of doors than on windows. 8. While Windows is easy to hack because you can try codes forever, you can just buy a good lock on your door and shut it. 9.The sun glaring on your screen trough your windows? GET MICROSOFT DOORS! 10. I dare you make one, i live doing this shit. Capcom before. And special thanks to you! Thanks for playing! Capcom now: Fuck off thats not DLC paywall! its actual downloadable only content! Just pay 45 bucks to get all colors to all characters.... ...Downloading Allcolors 10kb

why did the chicken cross the road? because the food source on its original side was running low, thus forcing the chicken to find other food options.

Bob: Why did the chicken cross the road? Angus: To get to the other side... Bob: No. Chickens are unaware of the dangers of the road, and it was ignorant of the oncoming traffic during it's aimless wandering.

Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? No reply cause Kyle got knocked out by the door.

a blond walks in to a post... OUCH

How does a black chick tell if she's pregnant? When she pulls the tampon out, all the cotton is already picked.

Whats worse than being a 40 year old virgin? Being a 12 year old girl in Africa who gets raped everyday to feed her family.

There is no I in Pie except for the I

who ever is reading this....

Whats white and bad for your teeth? A refridgerator

what do you call a bear with socks on A bear with socks on

If the best things in life are free, whats the hardest things in life? Death.

yo mama so old she was a waiter at the last supper.

Yeah sure comment below, and soylent green is fucking people! Moral: "You are judging the spitting image of yourself, except that you are doomed to remain ignorant and judgmental"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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