Did you know, even though penguins ARE birds... They don't live in volcanoes?

What do you call a dirty black person? Unhygienic

What state is round on both ends and high in the middle? Ocoloradoo.

a woman leaves the kitchen.......

What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things, because a dead baby isn't funny at all.

A man is shipwrecked on a desert island. One day, he finds an old lamp. When he rubs it, a genie appears. The genie says, "You have freed me. As a reward, I will grant you three wishes." The man smacks himself in the face and mutters, "Oh god, I'm seeing genies now. I must be delirious from lack of food and water." Several hours later, he dies.

Seargent: Quick seal off all the exits so he cant get away. Private: OK 2 minutes later Private: He escaped sir Seargent: What, how Private: through one of the entrances

What did the boy with no arms, no legs, and cancer get for his birthday? AIDS

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic And so am I

Did u hear what happened to that man with no arms and no legs who tried to play water polo? No, what happened He drowned....

What did the blind and deaf kid get for Christmas? Leukemia.

How do you minimize the likelihood of theft? Take the derivative.

How did a baby get across the street? Stapled to a chicken.

Wwhat's black on top and white on the bottom? Rape.

penis haha

A man accidentally forgets his daughter at a Sizzler

Why didn't the monkey cross the road? He saw the chicken get run over.

Your Mother

A couple was arguing about how the man was cheating and he was in "The Doghouse". There clever son pointed out that they didn't own a dog.

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in an oven.

What ended my last relationship? Oncoming traffic.

Roses are red, Violets aren't blue, They're fucking violet, And I hate you.

Facebook How i met my mother

Roses are red Violets are blue You're adopted and Santa Claus isn't real

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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