What kinds of children go to heaven dead ones

Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are yellow Azeleas are pinkish purple

Why is a charlie horse called a charlie horse? Well there was this boy charlie and he had a horse and it died in a fire.

Once upon a time, I farted They believe this now as the "Big Bang"

A. Knock, Knock B. Come in

Wal-mart didn't have the product I wanted. So I yelled at the manager until they had it. It didn't work and i was taken to jail.

A girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

Why did Sally's Ice Cream melt? Sally was on Fire

In Soviet Russia, you have no rights!

rose's are red, bananas are yellow, yo mama's so fat she jiggles like jello

a man walks into a bar. ouch.

what do you call a nun in a wheel chair? Virgin Mobile By: jb lshs

nipple

Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird

Mommy mommy I don't want to see grandma. Shut up and keep digging.

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

whats the one about not giving a crap? oh yea this one

Why doesn't a chicken wear pants? Because, there are no tailors in the area who make pants suitable for chickens to wear.

civil rights

Roses are red Violets are blue I forgot to go to the bathroom

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

why did the girl eat a banana? because she was hungry

what do you call cheese that isn't yours? Chuck Norris' Cheese

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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