How do you make Mandy Ann shut up? Clown Car

What's the best way to get gum out of your hair? Cancer

Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I am a dog

knock knock hold on im takin a poop!

Knock, knock. Who's there? I. I who? I broke my dick.

So an irishmen, jewish, and asain walk into the bar...and the bartender said get out..

What do you call two banana's on someone's feet? Garbage.

What did the lamp say to the pencil? Nothing. Lamps and pencils are inanimate objects and are also non sentient so therefore are incapable of talking or listening or having any emotions.

How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You were adopted and I couldn't think of a good way to tell you...

21

Think of a number between 2 and 10? 3.141592653589793238462643383279502884197169399375105820974944592307816406286 208998628034825342117067982148086513282306647093844609550582231725359408128481 11745028410270193852110555964462294895493038

Why did the kid fail? He procrastinated.

A black van approaches a small boy. The boy gets in the van, and the van drives away.

what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

I like my coffee how I like my women. Without a penis. - Blake Woodman

Doris was putting up Christmas lights when he noticed the bulb's suddenly came on. He was puzzled at first, as he hadn't plugged them in. He climbed down the ladder and found that it was his son, Robby who had plugged the lights in.

What's green, long, and covered in forks? Grass. I lied about the forks.

What did Einstein say to the blonde? 'What specific part of the theory don't you understand?'

*spongebob voice* 25

Why did they monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

womens rights

Knock Knock! Who's there? I am.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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