~Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was dead. ~ ~Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was stapled to the monkey!!!

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Do you know what a third world bathroom smells like? Crap

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Man 1: Ask me if I'm a tree. Man2: Are you a tree? Man1: no.

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A flea walks into a bar. Nobody notices because it is a very small insect

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Your grandma's cookies.

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What happened to your hamster? It died.

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Why did the ginger cross the road? To tell the police that her family had been taken hostage.

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What did the man with Alzheimer's get for Christmas? Happy New Year!

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So a dog walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Quickly, someone give me the number for animal control."

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Do you know who's gay? Homosexuals.

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a burglar walks in a house the alarm goes off and the police come

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4 people: A pilot, Bill Gates, the Pope, and a little kid, are all on an airplane with only 3 parachutes, when the plane's engine explodes and starts to go down. But the pilot makes an emergency landing at a nearby airport and everybody is okay.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says: Why the long face? The horse says: I'm a horse. We have long faces.

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Q. What was the the cancer's patients favorite song? A. Radioactive

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Your mother is so fat that people make rude comments about her behind her back, but they shouldn't because she's a really nice lady.

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jimmy carr walks into a tax office.

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A couple was arguing about how the man was cheating and he was in "The Doghouse". There clever son pointed out that they didn't own a dog.

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squirrels with massive bonerss

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What did the foot say to the other foot? Nothing, because they are feet.

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Q:Why did the man throw his clock out the window A:Because he didn't like his clock

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house? A: babies lack the intelligence and motor skills to accomplish such a task so it is not practical to hire them for a painting job.

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Two Drunks walk out of a bar. They look down an alley and see a dog licking his balls. The first drunk says" Man, I wish I could do that." The second guy replies " Well you better pet him first."

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What is the difference between a rat and an italian? nothing.

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops