What's green, long, and covered in forks? Grass. I lied about the forks.

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock.. Whose there? Not Sara

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Helen Keller went to town riding on a pony she stuck a feather in her hat and called it uuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? EVERYWHERE

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hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

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Q: what did the man with a broken jaw say? A: nnamkkiuuiriwojjkmgfmls!!!!

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Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. One polar says to the other, "Pass the soap please." And the other polar bear says, "No soap, radio!"

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How did the fat guy die? After an autopsy, it was discovered he was unaware of his type 2 diabetes and therefore did not treat it

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

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Why was the little boy upset? An arson set fire to his house, leaving him nowhere to live.

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Why did the baby cross the road? 'cause i kicked it.

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What's black and white and red all over? A pile of dead, mixed-race babies.

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What did the dinosaur and John Wayne say to the Easter Bunny? Nothing, they're both dead and the Easter Bunny isn't real.

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Q: What's the best way to get a woman to stalk talking? A: Ask them nicely.

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What is the definition of a "crying shame"? Very similar to the definition of a shame, but moreso.

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What did the retarded guy say to the other retaarded guy? A. Your retarded

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children of those parents which re childless, often are childless too...

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why was six afraid of seven? seven was a sex offender

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

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Neither does he.

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Q: What do you call Justin Bieber with a penis? A: Darn good plastic surgery.

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Once upon a time, there was this guy. He lived a good life and then died.

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The black man leaves the strip club.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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