Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have short-term memory loss. And roses are red.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor? -Cody Williams

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What does the Cookie Monster eat? Nothing. The Cookie Monster is not a living, sentient being and does not require sustenance to live.

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HEY EVERYONE THUMBS UP!

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What do Micheal Jackson and Niel Armstrong have in common? Armstrong did the earthwalk on the moon and Jackson F#$%ed little boys in the butt.

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Roses are red violets are blue i heart my toilet Becuase it holds all my POO!!!!!!!!

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What do you call a white guy with a taller black woman? A man in a deeply committed relationship.

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An elephant and a llama walk into a bar. Realizing that they must have broken out of the local zoo, all of the people run out of the bar screaming.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartenders says, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because horses do not comprehend English. He then becomes startled by his surroundings and bolts out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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A dog walked into a bar. The bartender barked at the dog and the dog replied with, "I don't speak dog language."

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set. Cuz she had no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally

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If life gives you melons ... You might be dyslexic

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Knock Knock Who's There? You don't know me, but I just hit a car parked on the street outside your house and I believe its yours, we should exchange information

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*Knock knock* Who's there? Stab.

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No Mom! No! I DON'T WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU!

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Your mams so fat that she has aids... and i gave it to her

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

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Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he has no arms or legs. Why doesn't he have any arms or legs? Because he is a potato.

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Mexicans are like waffles

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Who eats chicken noodle soup? Anybody who enjoys chicken noodle soup.

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What did the senile man say to the kids on his lawn? Tree dance the gator thong for my nipples.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, shes already been told twice

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Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

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Yes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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