Whats black, white, and red all over? A severely beaten and bruised man who was found un conscience and robbed in a dark parking lot behind Dennys at 2 o'clock in the morning.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anyone??????????/

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do Batman and Harry Potter have in common? Their parents are dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

69

thumb_up thumb_down -2

whats the best thing about polio...death

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did Jimmy cross the road? Because a chicken was about to cross the road, and he wanted to be kind and help the old 72-aged chicken get across the road. Because Jimmy had a grandfather that passed away because he was too old and nobody helped him cross the road. Jimmy is haunted by that memory and doesn't want that to happen to anyone else. Especially a chicken.... Also there were no cars and his best friend chicken was on the other side waiting for him.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the african jump in the swimming pool? Because it was a really hot day and he wanted to cool down

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What rhymes with shuck and starts with an f flamethrower

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you stop a bus? You press the brake pedal, causing the brake pads to squeeze the tires. Which will slow the momentum of the bus to the point of stopping.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q. How are a bird and a turtle alike? A. They both fly. Except the turtle.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: What did the farmer say when he coudn't find his tractor? A: "where's my tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Two men are walking in a forest And they find this deep whole, so they spit in it to see how deep it but they here nothing So they throw a rock in and still hear nothing Them they find this old tramission and throw that in. A couple second later the goat comes running by and jumps in the whole A couple minutes pass and an old farmer walks up and asks if they had seen his goat and they replied" yea it just ran and jumped into that whole. The farmer says "that's weird considering I had him tied up to an old tramission

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A guy walks into a bar, and then is hit with the full force of all the things he never did in life, of how he wasted his younger years chasing a bigger paycheck rather than trying to live life, and all the love he wasted on people who didn't care about him. He begins to cry as his first drink arrives, and orders many more as the night passes. He loses his keys as he leaves and stumbles home in a drunken stupor, contemplating suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

how many jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? none their all dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

a woman came back from a long vacation, one of her male employes noticed that her breast were much larger, "wow, did you get a boob job?" he asked. she replied "no i have breast cancer"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what do you think when you see someone throw a man with no arms and legs into the ocean? chances of survival are minimal

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I wonder if God looks at the Earth all these years later and thinks, Man, I really went overboard with the water, didn't I?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is black and red? Something that is black and red.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

- My grand mother died. - I'm sorry.... Did She died of old age ? - No, she got eaten by a giant worm.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why Couldn't the pirates see the movie? Because the mall strictly enforced local curfew laws ; and one of the pirates was unable to provide a valid form of identification.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

if quizzes are quizzical, arent tests testical?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: What's your favorite song? A: Not one in particular. I like all kinds of music.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Two guys walk into a bat, they have a couple drinks then go home, one crashed and died in a horrible drunk driving accident. The other, who took a cab, went home and viciously beat his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops