An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why can't Susie jump rope? Because she has no arms. Knock knock! who's there? Not Susie.

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how do you decrease the unemployment figures? abolish lidle, aldi, and netto

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a homicidal maniac, six has every right to be afraid

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Why are kenyans so fast? Because due to evolutionary changes, people from that area of the world have evolved to have superior muscle builds to sprint, hence giving them a natural advantage against an equally trained athlete form another part of the world with an equal skill level

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Come on, I am trying to cheer you up a bit, honestly how high?

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Knock Knock Who's there? Banana Bananas can't talk.

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How many mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Juan.

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Yo Mamma's so dumb... She cannot manage to find a decent job without her GED.

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what do you call a black man on tv? an actor

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I like my coffee like I like my women..... Without Hepatitis.

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knock knock who's there no one

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Sigh... You know life, you start all optimistic and "I am going to be wealthy mommy and stuff" Then you know, life turns not quite out like you planned it, and, well, you wish you had made some other choices you know what I mean... Your grades where not that good, that girl you really loved did not like you back, you know what I mean right? ...Well I don't, how is it like?

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An Amish man walks into a bar. He then orders a non-alcoholic beverage due to the temperance practices of the Amish faith.

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A man sat on a chair

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Man 1: Ask me if I'm a tree. Man2: Are you a tree? Man1: no.

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A ginger a blond and a burnett where walking in the dessert... They died of heat exhaustion.

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What did the Carbon atom say to the Oxygen atom? Nothing, basic elements are incapable of speech. It requires a culmination of many atoms to form a living human capable of speaking to another human.

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A woman was in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband. Shortly after she brings the sandwich to him and he thanks her seeing as his disabled legs prevent him from walking to the kitchen and making one himself. His wife later heads to her job as a firefighter.

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why do some Jewish people have big noses? There religion doesn't affect the size of there nose it really depends on genetics, like the if there parents had a big nose, or a small one would probably affect the size of a Jewish person nose

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A homosexual black man and a 13 year old child are in the shower at the local gym. The black man says to the boy "you dropped your soap, why don't you pick it up?" The boy promptly thanks the black man, picks up his soap and continues to shower.

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Q: whats a bunny's favorite music genre A: smooth jazz

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Why was the boy sad? He had just had his legs amputated and will never walk again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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