Three men sit at a bar. A clown walks in, so the first man says, "Oh, what fresh hell is this?", gets up and leaves. Then a fairy flies in, so the second man says, "Aw, hell no!", gets up and leaves. So the third man was alone with the fairy and clown.

How do you fit 100 babies in a bucket? put them in a blender. How do you get them out? potato chips.

why was the little girl afraid of the dark because she was brutally raped in the dark when she was 4.

why did the girl cross the road ? to get run over by a flee of running cows

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing. Muffins are incapable of speaking.

What's funnier than killing a bunch of orphans? Pretty much anything is funnier than that. What's wrong with you?

Kill me? Lol, come get me sis, I can kill you wit my mullet, nobody wants to take my phone, but your sister already replied to my "anna fuck" with "arent you married buddy? :)" yeah a smiley, ill show you! The doors are open, if I fail to take you out, I am not deserving of living futher, course yea mother blusx to everywown, I mean she is horny all the tiem! Anywaz, hurry up, im out of stims so im fallin sleeps, told ur sis to send me a nude pic, rite now... so this mite take 3 minuts. Hey, watch the next pic im gonna send you, that should motivate you to fight me sersly, i men sure im slo, but imma sp ful ov valeium dat i feel nor feear no pain... never feeer pain so whateves... Nah your sis is skinny, thats not here, the pixture is fakye, for now... u dyou know dat she keeps snending them hearte and smile and even a smilei with a rose, thats FLIRIIIIIING! Flirting, anyway you get the picture, but I wont respon anymor becuz i am shuttin down this pc and gonna dream abot the things to0 you sis. ;)

What does a baby sound like when put in the microwave? I don't know, I was masturbating.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because Se7en was a scary movie!

Joe Paterno doesn't walk into a police station..

Q: Whats worse than the death of flappy bird? A: The holocaust.

Moves Like AJgger- Marron 5

A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

Knock Knock! Hmm. I'm not expecting anyone. It's probably just a telemarketer, and I'm not very interested in purchasing anything at the moment. I won't answer it.

When you wish upon a star... ... you're actually a few million years late, according to astronomy. The star is dead. Just like your dreams.

69

400 asian people walked in a bar

Why did the boy have no friends? Because he was autistic.

Why couldn't the asian drive the car. He was underage and did not have his license yet.

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

Why did the pirate fall off his ship? He got pushed off by another pirate

A mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who's driving? The chauffer, they are both rich business men.

What's worse than finding a repeated joke on Anti-Joke? Your family being massacred in front of your eyes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...