What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? The doctor prescribes him tablets to treat his bi-polar tendencies.

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Why did the man cross the road? Because the light turned green

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full house

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Me: You know what's funnier than 24. Friend: 25? Me: No, 9/11

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There was Jew, a black guy, an Asian guy, and a Mexican guy at the store. The store was called Walmart.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she was deaf and blind and would have been a hazard to herself and others.

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What's black and hangs from a rope on a tree in my backyard? A tire swing.

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One day a child goes to the doctor and says, "it hurts when do this" as he pokes his throat. The doctor, after several well-performed deep tissue testing, diagnosed the child with stage four esophageal cancer. The child cried himself to sleep that night.

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What's worse than watching 5 homeless men have an orgy? Waking up and having to clean the sheets

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Haikus are easy But they often dont make sense flying flamingos

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Why did the zuccini fly? I was in an acid trip.

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what did the wall say to the floor? nothing interior structure supports do not talk

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Knock Knock! Well come on in!

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knock knock who's there no one

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Theres a monkey that walks into a bar. I forget the rest of the joke but your moms a w****

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to hit with a sledgehammer, the other one's a watermelon.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. (do you get it cause the robot has no arms)

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When life gives you lemons, thank life for its generosity.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Two holocausts What's worse than two holocausts? Twilight

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Why did the blonde laugh at the funeral? She suffers from autism, and doesn't understand when it isn't appropriate to laugh. The mourners at the funeral, understanding this problem, ignored her and carried on with the service.

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Did you know Hellen Keller Had a pony neither did she

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yo mamma so fat she got pied to be the Olympic swimming pool

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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Knock knock Who's there? Hello??? .....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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