When I exited the hospital one day, I spotted a sign saying "Come back soon!" Soon afterwards I saw people protesting to ban dihydrogen monoxide. The next day on tv I saw an ad for a solar powered lightbulb. Then I saw a Gun control poster. I cried, this being the dumbest thing I had seen yet, and the world was certainly doomed due to humanity's general stupidity. I saw a chicken crossing a packed road. Why did the chicken feel the urge to cross the road?

Why did Billy drop his ice cream? He found out his family was killed in a terrorist attack.

Whu did the boy drop his cheeseburger? Because the school janitor whacked him with a mallet.

How do you find out how many Mexicans are living in the United States? Take a Census.

Conner Schmidt's fiance has the fattest ass in the world <3

What does Snoop dog wash his clothes with Bleach

what do you call a young man? a little boy

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

whats the dif...mexicans are gay

Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose!

How do you get 100 illegal immigrants into a furnace? Tell 'em it's England.

1 fish 2 fish red fish wait why is the fish red , oh I forgot I killed it

I created darkness. God created the stars. God created the bee. I created the wasp. God created the child. I banged your mother. Moral: Soon my wings of darkness shall destroy your very own star, these words seem empty now, so I will fill them with true meaning and purpose as I will give the same to you the day the sky brightens no more.

Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor? A: Because he had brain cancer.

Your mammas so fat, she weighs significantly more than the average person.

Why was the girl crying? Because she was brutally raped

"Well, you done done me and you bet I felt it; I tried to be chill, but then I realized that when used as an adjective, 'chill' refers to the temperature." -Jason Mraz

Yo mama so fat, her whole family is encouraging her to exercise and go on a diet.

Your mother's so fat, her blood type was Ragu

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

What do you get when you cross a hippo with a dishwasher? 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7

Why are Ethiopians so fast? Because antelope are also very fast.

Knock! Knock! Who's There? The Police. Open the damn door. Nobody Is Home.

When life throws you lemons, duck cuz they freakin' hurt

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...