Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It got shot. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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If there are 50 oranges and 50 waffles tied to a fence post. How many cow utters does it take to shit green? urine.

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What happened to Liam? He Died.

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i have to pee out my ass.

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Whats worse than finding half of a worm in your apple? Noticing the apple is oversized and finding half of a dead baby.

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What's worse than getting stabbed Getting stabbed two times

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FUCK THE CHRISTIANS

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What do Connecticut school kids get at Christmas? Shot.

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What's black, white, and red all over? An ovulating mulatto woman.

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Why did the Mexican stop mowing the family's lawn? Because he felt it was time for his son to learn some responsibility.

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The person below me is weird.

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The time and place do not matter because I'm a lesbian.

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A man goes to the beach to meat babes, but know one seemes to notice him. The man notices another man with a crowed of beautiful women surrounding him. Later that day he stops the man and asks him, how do you get all those girls? the man replies put a potato in your bathing suit. so the next day the man puts a potato in his bathing suit, this time he notices girls walking by and laughing, he goes to the man at the end of the day and asks why it did not work, the man replies, next time try putting the potato in the front

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How do you make a bull angry? Light it on fire

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I have a black guy on my family tree. He's my cousin.

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Q.What did the anti-joke reader say to the doctor? A-My finger is stuck on the dislike button.

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split your ass cheek

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Paper shield.

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What is worse than seeing a pile of dead minorities? Dropping a dollar.

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How do you get a Mother out of a tree? Ask them to come down, because it is really not socially acceptable for a responsible adult to be climbing trees.

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Why did the man smoke pot in the roller coaster? Because he was dyslexic and read the sign wrong and thought it read "You must be high to go on this ride."

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if you like, i will tell my crush maddy i love her, just kidding i wont do shit.

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you: your adopted me: i was so thanks for saying you ass

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America were the American dream is something only foreigners believe in

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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