What do you call a man with a black book? I don't know.

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What's the difference between a tigar and a shark? One's a land mammal.

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Peaches eat leaches, that is why sneaches live on beaches.

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Why did the cow cross the road? He was in the moooooooood.

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A man is walking in the desert, alone and lost, when suddenly he finds a lamp. The man picks up the lamp and to his surprise, a genie bursts out of the lamp ! The genie says to the man: "Thank you, kind man! You have freed me from this prison I have been in for a million years. I am in your dept and will grant you three wishes." The man replies: "Wow, you've been in there for a million years and all you have to give me are three wishes?" The genie was really sad to hear of the man's lack of appreciation and flew away, leaving the man. The man eventually died of starvation and dehydration.

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A military serviceman returns home from a tour of duty to find his wife in bed with another man. He feels betrayed and files for divorce, then later meets a more faithful woman with whom he has a more fulfilling relationship.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eyepatch? Names.

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IMMMIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM a beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee immmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmiiiiooooooooooooommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmoooooooooooodfssgihsfdiug

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THE END.

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You're mother is so retarded that I probably shouldn't be making fun of her because it would be considered discriminatory.

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Why did the meme cross the road? MEME XD

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot.... ya' damn racist!

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Your mama is so fat that when she farted she called it global warming

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Why is the sky blue? Because bicycles have two tires

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What did Frankenstein say to Dracula? Hey, that's a nice cape.

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when chuck norris plays call of duty, his only perk is ghost pro.

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Q: What do racists call a disgusting filthy monkey that savagely jumps around in the jungle and steals white chicks? A: The same as the rest, Donkey Kong.

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Jesus walks int a hotel and places a handful of nails on the counter in front of the innkeeper. He is immediately turned away as the innkeeper understandably does not accept nails as currency.

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A burglar broke into a house one night. He picked up a CD player to place in his sack and a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark, saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head, clicked the light on, and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "Devout Semites," the parrot replied.

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sky's the limit said the tree a.w. j.p.

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Your mom is so stupid, that she took an IQ test and was proven mentally retarded. Her family is devastated.

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how do u kill a black kid ..... stabb him in the face with a nife

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Yo mama so fat, that she feels uncomfortable in a bathing suit.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Boo." "I don't know anyone by that name. Please go away." -Louis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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