A Mexican man is sitting in his mansion.

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What happens if an unmovable object gets hit by an unstoppable force? To get to the other side.

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Why did the golfer take an extra pair of pants to the golf course? In case they ripped and he needed a replacement.

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Whu did the boy drop his cheeseburger? Because the school janitor whacked him with a mallet.

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Why is a blonde girl crying in the bathroom? Because she has been bullied and someone broke her nose.

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What is a cow's favorite drink? Well, I could be wrong and this is just my opinion, but I do not believe that animals experience feelings and, in corollary, favoritism towards anything, particularly regarding basic survival needs, such as hydration.

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. "Where's my tractor?"

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What does 2 + 2 equal? 4

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Whats worse than seeing your mom naked. Your dad.

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knock, knock... no one replies and it becomes obvious that no one is in the house.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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A muslim walks pass a bomb shop on his way to the international peace club.

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There are two types of people in this world: those who can count and those who can't. I happen to be one of those who can.

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A lady forgot to feed her goat. When she went to feed it, It wasn't there. Why? She didn't have a goat. Another lady forgot to feed her cat. When she went to feed it, it wasn't there. Why? It died 2 days earlier. A man forgot to feed his cow. When he went to go feed it, it wasn't there. Why? They had ate it for dinner last night. A teenage boy forgot to feed his hamster. When he went to feed it, it wasn't there. Why? He spent so much time playing video games that it ate itself. So the boy had his mom make him a sandwich.

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If strippers are exotic dancers then drug dealers are to exotic pharmacists.

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Q: What did Tommy do when it was time to go to bed? A: Go to bed. Q:What did Tommy do when it was time to wake up? A: Kill him self.

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A man walks into a bar. He is then rushed to the emergency room for severe blunt force trauma to the head and multiple cranial fractures. After years of mental therapy the man re-gains full cerebral capabilities and is extremely cautious to keep an eye out for potentially dangerous bars that present a threat to his fragile reconstructed skull.

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I watched The Pianist last night? Holocaust

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Hey, what’s your problem? I’m a Catholic whore currently enjoying congress out of wedlock with my black, Jewish boyfriend who works in a military abortion clinic. So, hail Satan, and have a lovely afternoon, madam. a.w. j.p.

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Whats worse than sour milk? 911. Whats worse than 911? drinking sout milk!

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Why did the man fall of the building? Someone shot both of his kneecaps.

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WHAT????

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A bench doesn't breathe, apparently Mexicans do.

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What did the ocean say to the black guy? Nothing, it just shot him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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