"Hey guys lets have a standing obviation." No one else stands....

thumb_up thumb_down +50

How is an orange like an airplane? They both have wings except an orange doesn't have wings

thumb_up thumb_down +46

If life gives you lemons, steal the declaration of independance and use the lemons and a hair dryer to reveal the numbers on the back. Then enbark on an epic journey that ends with the discovery of the templars treasure. Lastly, use the money you earned to buy some lemons and make some lemonade.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

A Muslim walks into a bar. BOOM

thumb_up thumb_down +46

How do you know if there is an elephant in your fridge? Well, because there's an elephant in your fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Knock Knock Who's there? Your real father. I left you when you were a month old and I have regretted the decision ever since. I would like to be a part of your life.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

there once was a time before bonerss it sucked it sucked real bad like that kid who never washes his gym closes bad Mason Manning JLR

thumb_up thumb_down +42

How do you seat four gay guys at a bar when there's only one stool? Flip the stool over.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why was the child lying in the scrap yard? because he was being torn apart by guard dogs.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Q: What is George Harrison's favorite hairstyle? A: How can we know? He's dead!

thumb_up thumb_down +40

A Muslim, a Jew, and a Christian find a magical lamp with a genie inside. He offers each of them one wish. The Muslim wishes that people didn't look at his people as terrorists. The Jew wishes that the Holocaust never happened, and the Christian wishes for world peace. Actually this didn't happen, Genies don't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

If there are 3 apples, and Johnny takes away 3 of them, how many apples does Johnny have? None, because Johnny got hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why did the man have a curiously-shaped scar on his cheek? He had been mauled by an owl as a child.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Okay, one second.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Knock Knock Who's there? Jimmy Tyler, your son Hi son *continues to open door

thumb_up thumb_down +40

whats 2 + 2? a black guy flying a kite

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What did the pimp do to his bitch? He thanked her and rewarded her for her years of dedication and preserverance

thumb_up thumb_down +38

whats funnier than hugos penis? Nothing!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +38

what are the three types of rings? -wedding ring -engagement ring -suffering

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why couldn't Sarah see through her telescope? She was blind

thumb_up thumb_down +38

what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

69

thumb_up thumb_down +36

what's the difference between a male and female skeleton? The jaw bone structure

thumb_up thumb_down +36

How do you fit 100 jews in a car? It wouldn't work.. Nevermind.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops