What did the woman with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A diagnosis.

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Humans and dolphins are the only species who have sex also for enjoyment.

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yo mummas so FAT to get to the other side

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What's better than Sookie? The holocaust

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a schizophrenic And so am I

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what would your nan do if she was alive right now? scratching the top of the coffin.

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Yeah, haha, I tend to put myself under a state of trance at the same time I put others down there, which makes it difficult to stop it sometimes, I do it for ethical reasons, I mean if I would ever hypnotize someone into feeling really bad, it would affect me as well. You might want to get some water on your face, you know, so your upper lips don't envy the lower ones.

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read this sentence again.

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You should get a new joke book............ because the newest edition has just be released

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Why did the elephant cross the road? It was being poached

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

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a man walks into a library Who the hell reads

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What's red and has zippers? Nothing, because watermelons can't physically drive without the help of a sheeps spinal cords ... DUH

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Why do Vampires drink your blood? Because the movie maker needed a story

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What do you call postman pat without a job? Pat.

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What's the difference between a lion and a stuffed lion? One is for children to play with, one will eat you alive.

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how do you get a cat out of a tree? shoot it

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What do you say to a fat guy working out congrat him and tell him he's doing a great job and keep up the work

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what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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what is red, white, and spins around real fast? a baby in a washing machine

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Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

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Why was Jimmy sad? Because he has a frog stapled to his forehead

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how do u make a plummer cry? Kill his children.... :)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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