Q. Why dont people like rian mcreesh ? A. Because he smells bad and gives off a creepy vibe ...

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? I could explain officer. You see, I was jogging and I was looking for my dog and she went on to me and I told her to stop but she wouldn't listen. I'm innocent I tell you! Innocent!

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Where do babies come from? You fathers penis.

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why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

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what do you call a black person who flies a plane? a pilot, you racist

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Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

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Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead!!!!

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What color do you get when you mix aquamarine with magenta? Transvestite.

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Q: Whats different about pizza and jewish people? A: Pizzas don't scream in the oven.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, if you had a pulmonary embolism, you would be too

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There once was a boy walking over a railroad track. He got hit by a train. He died.

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roses are blue, violets are red. I am color blind

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Joe Paterno walks into a bar...he should've walked into a police station and filed a report.

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What is in your backyard and is stalking you? Corn

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Your mom is so fat her daily calorie intake is dangerously above the recommended 2000 per day.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

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Q: Why didnt jim win the race ? A: Because he swalowed his tounge.

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What's worse then running out of toilet paper? Getting shot

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I banged your mom so hard that she got a urinary tract infection.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

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what did the drunk man say to the bar tender? Hello good sir. Fine day today isn't it.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I want to have sex But no one else wants to

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Heroshima

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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