What's worse than being caught in a downpour? Having your kneecaps ripped out of their sockets.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Some of the people on this site who write these "jokes" are complete morons. Many of them believe that racism, sexism, and spamming is hilarious. Each one of them is a ****ing dumbass and needs to be removed from this site. Racism is not funny, people are murdered because of it! Those who think that they are being funny by insulting others need to get a life and stop ruining this site for others who want to read good jokes free of racism. Africans, Hispanics, Jews, and everyone else deserves better than to be insulted like this. And I'm a white, so take that you racist whores! I apologize for those of you who have good humor that have to read this, but those other jerks need to be told off.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Yo mama so fat she has more chins than the Chinese phone book. A.V.T was here Fred.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

The past the present and the future walk into a bar it made no logical sense that three things that will always contradict each other exist with each other and can walk into a bar without limbs or being alive it wasn't tense it made no sense

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A white guy jumps over the fence belonging to a Mexican family

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Sarah lost both arms in a car accident Knock knock Who's there? Not sarah. Roses are red Violets are blue Wow. Clever Knock knock Who's there? Still not Sarah, as she is in a serious condition at her local hospital, and so is fighting for her life.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Looks like this is a *puts on sunglasses* Pair of sunglasses

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man found a magic lamp. He rubbed it and a genie emerged from the lamp. The genie asked what his new master's wishes were. The man wished for asthma.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Milkman. Milkman who? I've been coming here for 14 years and you don't even know my name? I helped take your mother to the hospital for crying out loud! I held you in my arms as a baby! And you don't even have the decency to remember MY NAME?! I'm sorry I don't live in a house that allows milk and other groceries to be delivered, I'm sorry that I wasn't born into a nice family with a nice home! I'm sorry that I have had to come here EVERY WEEK FOR FOURTEEN YEARS and you can't even remember my NAME! My name! I left my family for christmas one year to go pick up that elmo doll for you when you were a kid! I saved you from that burning treehouse! I helped you with you're 3rd grade science fair project and you won! YOU WON! We took a picture together that i have kept in my wallet. And i proudly say here's me and timmy. ME AND TIMMY! TIMMY! But no...you don't need to know my name. Well good day sir. You shan't see me again.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

whats the diffrence between madeline macan and a submarine? there isnt one there both at the bottom of the sea and full of seaman

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's worse than having a spiked club shoved up your butthole? Not much.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why is it a shame if a kid gets run over by a car? I like the newspaper headlines about stabbings better.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What is white and fluffy? A cotton ball.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why are black people so good at basketball? Hard work and dedication

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is an inanimate object and a Mexican is a human being.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the boy fall of of his bicycle? He was hit by an asteroid.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

If Voldemort was gay who would be his partner? Happy potter

thumb_up thumb_down +2

a blind man drinking from a dog, thinking it was a fountain

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where did my tractor go.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, Dandelions are red, I lit your garden on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

White NBA players.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why did the bus hit the kid? he dropped his ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Andi: I have a great knock-knock joke, but you need to start it. Jake: Okay...Knock-knock! Andi: Who's there? Jake: ...

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops