What is the best way to eat a dead baby? I don't know. That is incredibly disgusting.

A seal walks into a club... the seals freinds later inform him they are now at a bar the seal then walks into the bar... the seal was later beaten to death

How do you make a tissue dance? You really can't, but you could grab it and shake it around so it looks like its dancing.

How do you kill a vampire? Because vampires are figments of society's imagination and actuall living creatures, this task is impossible.

How was a blonde woman able to get into Harvard? She was smart and had a very good SAT score.

why does little Lucy have no friends? because she is in a wheelchair

Three couples went in to see the minister to see how to become members of his church. The minister said that they would have to go without sex for two weeks and then come back and tell him how it went. The first couple was retired, the second couple was middle-aged and the final couple was newlywed. Two weeks went by, and the couples returned to the minister. The retired couple said it was no problem at all. The middle-aged couple said it was tough for the first week, but after that, it was no problem. The newlyweds said it was fine until she dropped the can of paint. "Can of PAINT!" exclaimed the minister. "Yeah," said the newlywed man. "She dropped the can and when she bent over to pick it up I had to have her right there and then. Lust took over." The minister just shook his head and said that they were not welcome in the church. "That's okay," said the man. "We're not welcome in Home Depot either."

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, There are so many different endings to this, it makes me just wanna Shoot Myself!

why did the boy eat his lunch money? it was his lunch!

Carrot fingers

How do you get a clown off a swing? Hold his family at gun point

roses are red violets are blue porn hub is down your mums facebook will do

No soap radio

How do you protect yourself from fire? Kill an orphan and nail its bones to your skin.

a black guy hates chicken.

The Big Band Theory

What's black on top and white on the bottom? Half an oreo

What do you call it when you mix a raccoon with an 18-wheeler? A bloody mess on the highway. That smells like cheese

What will ur wife say when she finds you in bed with a hore-s.

It's raining it's poring the old man died die to a sudden increase in blood pressure thus leading to a heart attack

Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No it's Supe- oh wait it is a plane

Three guys walk in to a bar. One got a concussion.

A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. I just bought a new xbox.

What's worse than getting raped? getting raped by a horse in car while listening to nickelback

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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