No, Sarah. You know your hooks scratch the keys.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a big fat bully!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Go fuck yourself.

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops.

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Yo momma so old that she should be concerned about mesothelioma and asbestoses, as she may have lived during a period of increased asbestos use. She may also be at risk of osteoporosis and should take vitamin supplements daily to improve her rapidly deteriorating health.

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What did Dr. Pepper say to Sprite? I'm a Doctor.

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How does Moses like his tea? Hebrews it.

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your momma is so poor that she is on welfare.

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What did Helen Keller say when she was hit by a bus? . : ; : . : . :

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We got him in about five minutes, the kid will already be exhausted by the point we get to him, r rather, he gets to us. Pretty quick for a small geek I got to say, the photography we got of him is an obvious Photoshop, but he seems similar enough I guess. I would call, but it seems someone has been messing with all other "Erron`s" homes and phones if I had not dropped mine, I would not have noticed we have been bugged for a while, pretty professional gear too,

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Roses are nice, violets are fine, ill be the 6, if you be the 9!

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How did the fat man die? Clogged arteries leading to a heart attack.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream ? He got hit by a bus !

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So a man walks into a bar. Well, he trips over it because it was very low to the ground and he didn't see it.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Beluga Whale walk into a bar. The Priest says: "Well because today is a holy holiday, I'll take a glass of white wine to celebrate." The Rabbi says: "Well, because today I have to kindle thy sacred light, I'll have a glass of merlot." The Beluga Whale then says: "Ooooooooorrrrooooooommmmmmmm....."

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I think poop is tasty... just kidding.

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Son: i like gaming Mom: you are wasting your life *son jumps in trash can

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Why was the sex offender sweating in the playground? Because he was pushing his over weight son on the swing.

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What's worse than 1 bee sting ? 2 bee stings What's worse than 2 bee stings ? the holocaust what's worse than the holocaust ? 3 bee stings

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Two gay men walk into a bar. Holding hands.

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Knock knock Who's there? The interrupting doctor The interrupting doct... You have Cancer

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Why did the parrot fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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your mom is so ugly, when she throws a boomerang it doesn't come back

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A rooster is standing on top of a pointed bird house. He lays an egg. Which side does the egg fall, the left or the right? I don't care, I'm a vegetarian.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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