Harry thrust his wand forward, "Expelliarmus!" Voldemort casually ducks, and fires a killing curse at our hero.

Joe: Hey, why are your counters all red and your blender looks broken? Me: The same reason why Mrs. Johnson's baby is missing. ajl

How did the dragon get AIDS? He had sex with an HIV positive dragon months prior.

What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? I'm not sure, but I would probably have nightmares for a couple weeks.

A rooster is sitting on the top of a house. It lays an egg. Which way does it roll? This can be solved by using the dimensions and angles of the roof to find the most probable direction it would roll (Incorporating in the power of gravity of course). Of course if the egg from the roosters uteris came out in an akward or unlikely way, it could roll the other way.This can be factored in very quickly because with the video evidence of the rooster having the egg you can see how it was delivered(the video is not of which way it rolls, just of the delivery).

Q: Why is Abu Soooo Dank? A: Because he scores too many left-foot bangers

A man walks into a bar, it's funny because he is an alcholholic

I love you

Q: What is Paul's nickname A: His name is Paul, he doesn't need a nickname

i had a black friend once......just kidding

A woman got in her car to drive to work. She kept her hands on the wheel and eyes on the road and was able to avoid any accidents that could have occurred.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

Why did the clown fall out of the helicopter?? Gravity

Knock knock whos there? I have no anus

how many pieces of wood can a lumberjack cut in a minute? three dead squrlles a hat and and half of a tree oh and a bus. and if u get in his way alot of guts spewed every where

Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Why was 15 afraid of 16? Coz 16 was bigger than him.

Why do cats have nine lives? Because they don't have ten.

How do you kill a dinosaur? You don't. It's already dead.

whats worse than being ugly? being aivy.

Knock Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah's witness.

A horse walks into a bar. Realizing the severity of the situation, the bartender heads toward the exit... stumbling over a chair.

Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock The person who lives inside is depth.

Why was the kid picking his nose. Because someone shoved a bomb in it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...